FA-FO calculator

From the deepest depths of my lab, I present you- your own personal FA-FO calculator for all your lifes decisions!

This calculator will be shipped up to 7 working days after the order is placed (usually much sooner). I do not hold these in stock, so I need to 3D print them as you place an order.

Made out of the finest 3D printed materials, it includes custom FA and FO scales as well as FAFO calculated scale.

It is calibrated to the standard ISO1337:2025 (This international standard defines the calibration, verification, and operational parameters for mechanical calculators designed to compute the “Fuck Around & Find Out” (FAFO) principle. The standard ensures accuracy, repeatability, and robustness for FAFO calculations across all applications.)

Technical Specifications:

1. Input Calibration:

   • The FA input must be measured in arbitrary but consistently applied units (e.g., units of risk, stupidity, or horsepower).
   • The FO output must be directly proportional to FA in certified conditions.

2. Mechanical Accuracy:

   • The calculator must maintain an accuracy of ±5% across all FA values.
   • The dial or digital readout must clearly indicate when the FA value exceeds a predefined “Oh Shit” threshold.

3. Testing Procedures:

   • Calibration performed by controlled FA experiments, such as overclocking an uncooled CPU or operating heavy machinery with missing safety guards.
   • FO values must be documented and plotted against FA to ensure proper alignment with the FAFO principle.

4. Safety Considerations:

   • The calculator must include a hard stop mechanism when exceeding the FA safety threshold to prevent irreversible FO escalation.
   • Devices should have an emergency “Pull Out” feature allowing users to cease FA before irrecoverable FO occurs.

5. Verification & Compliance:

   • Each FAFO calculator must be certified using real-world test cases, such as:
     • Personal Finance FAFO Test: Increasing leverage in stock trading until bankruptcy is reached.
     • Mechanical Engineering FAFO Test: Over-tightening bolts until shearing occurs.
     • Social Dynamics FAFO Test: Escalating insults in a bar fight until a right hook lands.

6. Labeling Requirements:

   • All FAFO calculators must prominently display the “Certified By ISO 1337” badge.
   • The maximum FA limit before catastrophic FO must be clearly indicated.

Exemptions:

• Entities operating in Darwin Award Nomination Zones (DANZ) are excluded from certification due to the high probability of voluntary elimination from the standard’s test group.
• Governments and corporations are not eligible for ISO 1337 compliance as their FA-to-FO ratios tend to defy mathematical modeling.

Obviously, this is 3D printed joke toy that will look beautifully on your (or your CEO’s) office desk. I can recommend it to the politicians, CEO’s and pretty much everyone who are interested in exact FAFO measurements at all time. It is 3D printed in finest PLA plastic. Color of the knobs and arrows may vary from the pictures